Currently accepting donations, mainly monetary.

Shop N Save better have another Coupon Thursday soon. Not last week and not this week. I might starve.

The month of August excites me.

Artist of the day: Patrick S. Naggar

I chopped my hair off at the end of May. That was 18 inches gone. Just in time for summer. I loved it at first, but now it's too long. I hate how my hair grows so fast.

Adam Lambert is gay. So what. I still think he's dreamy.

My brother and future-sister-in-law's engagement extravaganza weekend was a very fun time. Almost as good as a real vacation.

Speaking of vacations... I went to Boston to visit Sister #1 from June 5-8. It was fantastic. I hate planes, but the good times made up for it. We were able to hang out with my aunt/ uncle/ cousin/ cousin-in-law/ cousin-in-law's mom/ cousin-in-law's baby. Fantastic. We drank a lot. Also fantastic. And it was very liberating to just hop on a plane all by myself. I felt like a big girl.

Work has been super stressful and I wish it wasn't. I enjoy my co-workers and bosses, but sometimes that's just not enough. I think I'm just easily stressed. And I think I have more wtf-is-going-on moments than anyone else. I want answers. And I'm a fan of logic. It seems that sometimes these things don't like to work together. It also seems that, even with fair warning, things don't get done until shit hits the fan.

I think my carpal tunnel is worsening. Work doesn't help. But I can't not work. Duh.

I had a horrible dream last night. Scratch that. It was a nightmare. I dreamed that I woke up 2 hours late for work. When I checked my cell phone there was a missed call from them, but I didn't hear it since it was on silent. Then they fired me for doing a no-call/no-show. When I woke up I had to give myself a serious reality check. My heart was racing as if I just sprinted 8 miles. I have never been late or missed a day of work. I take pride in that.

My friend Alex had a tshirt on sale at teefury.com yesterday. It slipped my mind to do a shout-out on LJ for him for people to buy it, but no one reads this anyway, right? Anyway, his design is here (click), though time's run out and you can't buy it anymore.

I feel like every time I start to write I have so much to say, but when I actually begin typing it all fades. I'm coming up short. All in all, life is good (mostly), the weather is too hot (too sudden), and I'm still as quirky (or just plain strange).

Artist of the day: Lucia Fabio

Maybe it's about time I confess my undying love for Adam Lambert. I'm almost ashamed to admit it because I don't want to be like those screaming girls. But I suppose honestly I would be one of those screaming girls if he were within 500 feet of me. Let's just say I will be super sad if he doesn't win Idol tonight.

Last week I had a doctor's appointment for a check up. After that experience I want to switch doctors, but I'm afraid that any other doctor wouldn't give me free samples instead of prescriptions. Dilemma. But I suppose all that matters is that I'm healthy.

Dad died a year ago yesterday. And a year ago today we were picking out his grave site and funeral flowers that he said not to waste money on. He should have known we would. I think one of my brothers said it best, that he felt one year old yesterday. I've done a lot of reflecting the past couple days. Basically I can't believe how far I've gotten in just a year. One year ago I couldn't even imagine going on [and being able to afford] 5 entire vacations. A high school diploma isn't even required for my job position. I don't make much. Don't go thinking I'm rich. I just have priorities. And a job with phenomenal travel benefits.

When I got to work yesterday morning I was sitting in the parking garage gathering my thoughts and mentally preparing for the day, as I usually do. Then i noticed about 50 (trying to estimate as best I can) ants crawling all over the outside of my car. It was disgusting. And it's not like the inside of my car is nasty -- I keep it very clean. So thank goodness they were only on the outside. I spent the first couple of hours at work feeling itchy out of my own paranoia. After I got off work of course there were no ants on my car, but Nate let me come over & wash it anyway. I think I just needed someone there for my own mental stability when I opened the hood. Somewhere in my mind I made up this scenario of millions of ants living under the hood. But of course there was nothing there except dried leaves under the windshield wipers. Anyway, point of the story is that I washed my car for the first time. I've had that car for 9 months.

This coming Saturday is my brother & future sister-in-law's engagement party. And then on Sunday the entire wedding party is going to the Cardinal's game. Very excited. I'm even more excited because I've worked Fri-Sun the past 3 weekends.

My next big purchase is going to be a new computer. I want to stay with Apple, but they're just so dang expensive! I'm currently using an E-Mac. It's ancient. And next I'm going to get a Mac Mini & a non-Apple display. It'll be more affordable that way. My purchase deadline is sometime in September. That way my 6 month premium of car/renter's insurance will be paid, my car's plates will have been renewed, and any car repairs/maintenance issues will be fixed (like new brakes and tires for sure... and anything else they find... UGH!)

Today is supposed to be nice and warm and sunny outside. Right now I have my windows open with fans on. The fresh air is very nice. And I'm listening to 2 Skinnee J's. I'm not sure this day can get any better.

Artist of the day: Ginou Choueiri

I still haven't decided how I feel about this love/hate relationship I have with work. Today I got a fantastic adrenaline rush off being busy. BAM BAM BAM BAM. That's how about 2 hours of the night went and for once it was fantastic to be/feel busy. I am also [mostly] in love with my schedule this week, which makes things even better. Business is still awesome, which means I've still been getting my 40 hours a week.

2 good friends of mine are headed to New York this week and I was able to give them a fairly decent hook-up. It might not be in Manhattan, but 3.5 miles from it isn't too shabby. This is also one of the reasons I love my job. The perks are amazing not only for me, but for friends too. And here I thought I was going to be the first one to take advantage of my discount. Turns out, it's friends! This makes me happy.

I spent way too much money on flowers for my mother. If they don't arrive tomorrow in perfect condition there will definitely be some complaining on my part to Teleflora. I got nothing but the best for my momma.

May makes me sad because it's the month in which I lost the things pictured below. Elton is the reason I want to name my future dog Daniel. Dad is the reason I am who I am today. And Cruella is the reason I think I'm tough shit [sometimes]. Maybe this May will prove to be better.

Work has been good lately. I go through phases of love and hate. I think I'm in the love phase. The crowds have been plentiful and not so demanding, and the bonuses make it even better.

I had so much to say when I started this. Now I'm coming up with nothing.

One year ago I never thought I'd make it this far with my sanity still in tact.

I'm looking forward to Friday night. And I'm looking forward to my vacations.

Artist of the day: Travis Louie

I bought plane tickets to Boston last night. I couldn't resist. They were cheap. And I have yet to visit Sister #1 in her own city. It's about time, I think. I've visited Sisters #2 and #3 twice already.

And I'm also going to Wilmington, NC.

If I didn't know better I'd think my new years resolution was to travel. Boston, MA; Kansas City, MO; Denver, CO; Wilmington, NC; Miami, FL; BAHAMAS! Let's just say that the next year is going to be exciting.

And please tell me why I need [and how to get] a flight and a hotel to/in Miami on SuperBowl Sunday, when the SuperBowl is IN Miami! CRAP!

Sometime else I'm going to drop money on a new computer. This one is nearly 5 years old and it's about to bite the dust. Plus, it takes FOREVER to do anything picture-related with my new camera on this thing. Upgrade is needed. And I can do it right for under $800. Exciting!

And I got an awesome tax return -- partly the reason I got those plane tickets to Boston in the first place. I'm also due for a ridiculously awesome paycheck tomorrow. Haven't gotten one like this since I was working 10 hours of overtime in August. What's even better is that I haven't gotten overtime since then either. Haha.

I must admit that the location of my work in relation to everything else is perfect, even with this insane road construction. We're borrowing supplies and labor from our sister-locations because we have all the business and they don't. Sometimes I feel lucky.

Hm. And some people are in serious need of an attitude check. I'm hoping-hoping-hoping that I'm not the only one who realizes this. I'm in no position to say anything.

I had one of the worst hangovers of my life yesterday morning. And of all the hangovers I've had, it's the one that went away the quickest. It was very strange. I must have over-indulged myself Monday night hanging with the boys and playing Uno.

I've been thinking about turning my kitchen into a studio. And Mom's basement, too.

Artist of the day: Simen Johan

I'm going to apologize ahead of time if some things don't make sense. I've been out of it all day.

My birthday was last Thursday. I spent the evening/night at work. It was definitely not the worst time I've had at work, but considering it was my birthday, I wish it would've gone better. I requested off Friday, Saturday, and Sunday morning... And thankfully my requests were granted.

Thursday night after I got off work I went to N's and ate pizza and he gave me an African violet -- my favorite plant EVER. He picked out a good one -- appeared very healthy. I named it Levona.

Friday I drove Levona to my apartment to re-pot her and she didn't even do into shock like I was expecting. My other African violet (named Henrietta) was very angry when I re-potted her. Maybe she's just sensitive.

[Just as a side note, I'm not that crazy. My African violets are my only named plants, and they only have names because I intend for them to live forever.]

After re-potting, I went back to N's and he took me thrifting, as I requested for my bday present. We went to a store that I had been to before, but it was N's first time there. I couldn't believe that I actually found 3 pairs of jeans that were actually long enough. That never happens. And they fit like a glove.

Saturday night I went out with friends and had a fantastic time. Let's just say that by the time Sunday rolled around I was definitely feeling the effects. And work was horrible for the first 3 hours I was there. I am so sick and tired of doing other people's jobs. And I'm fed up with the eye rolls I get when someone doesn't want to do their job and I tell them, based on the projected business for the night, they must. They make me look bad when they don't do their job, and I can't stand looking bad.

In other news, N and I got our Megabus tickets for KC. We're not sure which day we're leaving, so we ended up getting tickets to KC for 2 different days, and then we got the returning tickets. And that equals 6 tickets total between the 2 of us. The total was $9.00 combined. That averages to $1.50 a ride and that is absolutely amazing. Just proves that it pays to plan far in advance.

Today I've just felt like plain crap. I'm not sure why. My head was pounding earlier and I lied down on the couch and passed out for about 2.5 hours. I woke up and my headache was still there so I took some of my magic pills (AKA Excedrin) and now I'm going to blame the caffeine in the medicine for jolting me awake. On the plus side my headache is mostly gone.

One year ago I thought that by now my life would be stress-free. I wish this was true, but now I just have a different kind of stress than I did before. I can't even pin-point it. I'm not worried about the bills because somehow I manage to make enough to get by, and for that I really am grateful -- but I still wish I could afford the nicer things in life. I think I just need to relax more. I need to stop thinking about the "what-ifs" and the "maybes." I need to learn just to take life as it is and tackle things as they come my way instead of trying to deal with things before they exist.

I really miss how life used to be. And I really miss Dad.

Artist of the day: Sol Lewitt

I don't get paid enough to be so stressed at work.

It's official. I'm going on that freaking cruise. And I applied for a passport yesterday. I'm also going to Kansas City with N at the end of August, mainly for the Nelson-Atkins Museum. We're probably going to take Megabus for cheap. And with my discount we can stay at a full service hotel for the Motel 6 price. YES!

I really enjoy how somehow Isaac Hayes & Al Green make everything alright. Love it.

I'm going to lay in bed and look through my old sketch books. Looking for inspiration.

artist of the day: Catherine Chalmers

The first 5 months of the year are so depressing.

Or maybe I'm just dreading the one year anniversary of the one thing I still can't come to terms with.

Last night I cried for the first time in a long time, and it was strange.

Artist of the day: Justin Cooper

My hair feels exceptionally long today.

Last Friday was N's birthday. I took him to McCormick & Schmick's for dinner, and the hole in my wallet was well worth it.

Last Sunday was our 4 year anniversary. N got off work at 8pm-ish and we went to a favorite diner of ours, then went back to his place, watched G4 and Spike, and split a 12 pack of Fat Tire. Classy.

Fact: I would get paid more if I were bilingual. I'm considering asking my boss if speaking/understanding jive counts. I was tempted to hang up on a few people on the phone at work today.

The other day, one of the owners called to ask my boss for a favor. My boss is gone until Tuesday, so the owner guy and I were trying to figure out what to do to get this favor completed. He said, and I quote, "Now I don't want to have to call and bother your dad." My heart skipped. It was just his tone of voice and his confidence in being able to get a hold of my father. Then I realized that he thought I was one of the other girls whose dad works for the company. Disappointing. I was about to let him call my dad.

I worked until 11pm last night, then had to be back at 7am today. I got to bed around 11:45pm and fell asleep shortly after. Then I woke up at 2am... wide awake. Couldn't fall back to sleep. I even tried taking shots of gin to make myself pass out. By 5am I decided I'd better drink water instead of shots so I wouldn't end up going to work drunk. So yes, I've been awake since 2am with a mere 2 hours of sleep. UGH! I'm not entirely sure how I made it through work today. I tried to be as anti-social as possible by reading the newspapers all day.

I'm going to take a couple-day vacation in May to spend time with myself. I'm going to take a long weekend at the end of August to go to Kansas City with N. I'm going to go to Denver for a week with Mom at the end of September. And next February I'm going to the Bahamas. I am kind of excited even though I'm not yet entirely sure how I'm going to fund all of this.

I am half tempted to go to bed now and get 12 hours of sleep before I have to be back at work at 7am tomorrow.

Artist of the day: Christian Faur